“This is not really what I thought you’d start with.”
“I can’t help it. You’ve been heavily on my mind?”
“You asking me?”
“Charlie… I’m just writing something as you suggested.”
“Yes, but I thought you’d start with a poem or something.”
“I’m not that inspired lately.”
“What about a prompt.”
“You know my history with prompts.”
“Right. Well, kiddo, you’re kind of messed up in the head still.”
“Maybe I’m not! I’m just not feeling it… yet.”
“It’s a good thing you’re cute. Hmm… I know!”
“What?”
“Music. You love music and you ain’t getting any younger. Let’s go!”
“I’m not feeling it.”
“Come on! You’ve got me here somehow and you’re not feeling it? I see that look. You want me to take off my shirt and you want me.”
“No! Get off me! Stop it! I thought you wanted to help.”
“I’m trying but unfortunately it’s your brain that won’t budge.”
“True. I am in rut.”
“Just let everything go. Just forget everything else. While you’re here, nothing else exists. It’s you and this blank space where you’re free to do whatever you want. No one is judging you or blaming you or wanting anything from you. You’re free! Fly butterfly… flutter, fly… do whatever you want!”
“You’re right. You’re absolutely right! I have to. I want to. I’m going to. Yes! I will. I’m going to do it! I’m going to do what I do.”
“Very convincing. I’m super convinced…”
“What is that supposed to mean?”
“At this point I don’t know. I haven’t a clue. I’m still here, is all I know and I want to help. Somehow, which is weird because I’m you. I mean I’m you with balls but still… Fuck! Just put on some music and go for it! Who gives a fuck about anything or anyone else! Just do it! You won’t regret it.”
(When he talks to me like that, it’s unbearable. I feel like a child.)
“Mel…”
“Yes.”
“I heard that. Remember I can hear your thoughts.”
“Right. So…”
“So… yes! Get on with it!”
“Charlie…”
“Yes.”
“I meant what I said earlier.”
“What?”
“I’m glad you’re here.”
“Me too, Mel. Me too.”
© 2022 Mel Gutiér
Flutter of Dreams 